I am 14.
I am never happy any more. There is always something bad happening. Even when something good or something that I’ve been waiting for does happen, it always goes wrong.

For instance, I recently went to a concert of one of my favourite singers ever ever ever. I booked the tickets 6 months earlier. I booked seating tickets. 2 weeks before the concert, the venue rang us up to tell us that there had been a mix up, and they had sold too many seated tickets, so I had to stand. Even though I booked my tickets extremely early. I was ok with standing, it was a small venue, I thought I would get a good view. And I did. And it was all going very well, until I realised that I was heavily "leaking" (blood) (sorry any men reading this). I had to rush to the loo half way through the concert. I dragged my friends with me. I had no spare pads. I went back in to the gig. I almost fainted. What I thought was going to be a brilliant night, was terrible.

That is just one example of the hundreds of things that I’ve been looking forward for that have gone completely wrong.

I have no friends. Well, I have my best friend, but she is horrible to me and always puts me down. So I guess she isn’t exactly a best friend anymore. We go on different buses on the way home from school, and our buses were parked parallel to each other. I looked out of the window of my school bus, and I saw my "best friend" and some other girl laughing at me. Then when I got home I logged on to facebook and my "best friend" had sent me a message saying "ahahah you looked so funny on the bus earlier! you looked so grumpy and sorry for yourself. It was HILARIOUS". So, this has just put me down even more as you can imagine, especially as there was a reason for me looking sorry for myself.

My "best friend" didn’t know this when she sent me the email, because I didn’t like to tell her, but last night me and my mother had a huge argument. I won’t go into detail. It ended up with me crying in my bedroom, trying to get to sleep. My dad came in and told me that he once cried himself to sleep when his grandfather died. He told me such a touching story about his grandfather, which made me cry even more because I never got to see him. And the fact that 2 of my grandparents recently died, one of the remaining ones is in a mental hospital because he pretty much lost it and went mad when my grandmother died, and my other grandparent lives in the other side of the country.

Now. My brother. He is 3 years younger than me. He won’t let me have anything. That sounds spoilt, but it really isn’t. He hates to see me happy. He hates to get the blame for the slightest thing. He hates it when I am in the spotlight. I will give you an example, but you don’t have to read it, I know I’m going on a bit, I’ll try and make it short.
I am in a band. I did my first gig recently. My parents came to watch. On the way home, parents praised me, brother gets jealous of me having attention, he talks about how his piano teacher says he is amazing, parents give attention to him.
Even tiny things. Stupid things, like a conversations. If I am talking to my mum, and my brother wants to say something, he will interrupt, and if we ignore him, you would seriously, be beaten up by him. He gave me a black eye once. Not even joking.

There is a lot more than what I have said here, but I don’t want to bore you with my endless problems, but I just feel so alone and hated. What can I do?
you’re a friendly lot. Great at cheering people up, just when my life is absolutley great.
The comment above was aimed at Marion and JD. x

Jesus kid you’re only fourteen. You’ll get over it. You sound like a big raw peeled nerve. Stop being so sensitive. The more people know they can get to you the more they will. Next time your ‘best friend’ takes the pi*s just put your hand up to your mouth and fake a yawn. Develop a thick skin. Nothing puts off p*ss takers more than knowing it isnt working.

I’m 31 and have been friends with a 35-yr old brilliant woman (we were co-workers) for a few years now. We both have similar traits - career-oriented, ambitious, articulate and both educated. She’s far more than me though - she has a Masters Degree internationally and had a higher level job as a Manager in her dept. (I’m more on the Service level). I think she’s an awesome person and has done a lot both professionally and personally. Oh, and she’s also quite beautiful - skinny, works out, dresses well, has tons of friends and is spiritually sound (I think).

But… here’s the weird thing. So I’m actually disabled - short statured to be exact. I know, or think she’s never been jealous of me. She’s said openly she admires me, she thinks I’m talented and vice versa. She will do things like try to take care of me - when we go out, making sure I have what I need, or get me things (even though I may not need her help). I’ve always been appreciative of her, yet I feel like there’s something she needs from me that I don’t know what it is. She acts like she never wants something from me, yet will be warm one day and cold the next.

Lastly, I do want to ask about this: One time, while we were out - there was another little person - a shorter, younger man on the street. She said, "Ohhh, you should go for him, you two would be cute together." Then the more I talked to her about it, I found that she thinks I should only be with people like me, and not so much with average-sized men - who I was dating at the time. I felt really weird about that. It was like… I feel like she didn’t want me to be at a "higher level" but stay in mine. Yet we are friends. What does this mean - like is she a frenemy, a co-dependent or something else?

What you think is true. She’s not exactly a frenemy because she doesn’t do anything bad to you. And she’s not co-dependent because she’s not dependent on you. She just sounds intimidated by you that you might achieve higher than her. That’s all.

There’s this guy I’ve been crushing on for weeks. I was getting to know him, we have several things in common and there was obvious chemistry. Until recently, about a week ago, I found out that he got back with his ex. He’s back with the girl that dumped him and started seeing another girl. I found this out THE SAME DAY one of his close friends Ashleigh came up with the brilliant idea of setting us up on a double date. It would’ve been her boyfriend and her, and me and him. BUT NO, he’s back with his ex-girlfriend. -sigh- I mean people have told me that this relationship might not last, (that she isn’t even very nice to him) and they could break up at any minute. However, I do NOT want to get my hopes up and get hurt again. It’s still sad and a bit disappointing every time I think of it, but I try not to.
you may like him but i would just let him go and see if he starts talking to you if he’s still interested after him and that girl breaks up, that means he’s still thinking about you (:

Me and my girlfriend have been together for 2 months, but we were best friends for 3 years before that. We’re both 18 and we’re both really mature, so no worries there! Anyhow, the problem…

I’m a constant worrier. Even if things are going absolutely fine I can’t help but worry that she doesn’t like me, that she wants to break-up with me and that she’s trying to push me away. Well, that was what I was like a few weeks ago - but I managed to move past that.

Anyway, NOW my problem isn’t that I’m worrying about that stuff, but the fact that I just can’t ever be "happy" about the relationship when I’m not with her, because there’s always something in the back of my mind telling me to be sad. So, I worry. And I need to know how to stop!

I can’t handle going home after a day at school and thinking about it. Even if we have a brilliant day I’ll go home and just think about things too much and make myself paranoid.

How can I seriously stop myself from doing this?

It sounds to me like you need constant reassurance in this relationship. You need to get down to the heart of "why" you need this constant reassurance. And once you figure out the "why" you can start working on not worrying. But, until you figure out what it is you are worrying about there is no way to stop worrying. It seems like something is bothering you deep down inside and you need to figure out what that something is.

ALONG WITH PREVIOUS TESTS PAPERS

Don’t join any of such institutes they are of no use unless you have the capability of grabbing at a very fast speed. Secondly you may realize this after six months only. what is going to work is the knowledge of your own in the end.

ALL THE BEST

Recently there has been a number of suicides on college campuses (see articles below on NYU, Cornell and Yale). I was talking with my friend who goes to an Ivy school the other day about why these brilliant people would take their lives at such a young age. Many of them are smart, social and high achievers ( I dream of becoming like that). Maybe they are stressed as mentioned in the articles but I don’t think stress is the sole cause. If they indeed have depression, doesn’t it show from their behaviors? I’d like to hear other people’s opinions on this. Why did they do it and what exactly is depression and how stress can impact it?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/14/sam-roweis-nyu-professor-_n_421500.html
http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/03/20/new.york.cornell.suicides/index.html
http://www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2010/03/31/2010-03-31_man_who_leaped_to_death_from_empire_state_building_idd_as_yale_university_studen.html

Depression is a horrible thing to suffer from. You know the days when you feel like "bleh." You don’t feel your best and everything just seems pointless and stupid. That’s a little smudge of depression. People with depression usually have little to no energy, they don’t see any point in anything and in that sense even being alive and living is somewhat.. boring/pointless to them. That is just a little bit of what depression is like. I suggest looking it up for yourself. It’s a very interesting topic.
For further research, here’s a website with info about symptoms and the different types of depression. http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/depression-symptoms-and-types
I have researched bipolar disorder quite a bit and I’ve found that because people suffering from manic depression have a greater range of emotion and feeling that their creativity and intelligence is also increased from the normal person. This same connection could also be true for regular depression, however, it’s easier to see with bipolar depression because during mania, there is motivation and energy to indulge in creative projects.
In the cases of the articles that you provided, I personally don’t believe it was stress that cause these people to commit suicide. For the professor, postpartum depression could have played a role as he was a newish parent (his twins are 15 months old). At Cornell, since 6 suicides have happened in this school year alone and the last two were close together, I think there was probably some group mentality going on. Rather there was a suicide-pact (a bit far-fetched to me) or the latter victims got inspiration from the first people, i don’t know. The last man is a bit troubling, as his suicide was definitely planned and it doesn’t say that his friends or family were shocked by it or that it was out of character as the other articles say. It sounds as if he had been suffering from depression or some other disorder for some time and finally felt he had no way out except death.

i really struggle to sleep at night, it’s like my head wont shut the hell up. my body is tired but my head is buzzing away. i’ve tried not drinking caffiene and i’ve tried breathing techniques but nothing seems to help. And when i do get to sleep i have really strange dreams, for instance…being killed, being chased, failing and just things which happened when i was a little girl.They feel so real.

I also acting, so i like creating new characters by myself. Thinking about it, it’s actually silly but i don’t care. I am scared of alot of things..from sharks to dry sponges. and when i mean scared i mean scared. i can’t touch it, i can’t have anyone near me touch it. I’m the same with felt, velvet etc.
I have a thing with writing lists..just say somethings on my mind or an idea i HAVE to write it down or else my head starts to hurt.

i can’t remember things, like my childhood. it’s like my head has blocked it out. like seriously, i can hardly remember anything. I’m only 15 but i can’t remember anything that happened from 13 +. Like a friend says about something that happened, something big’ish and i can’t remember it atall..as if it didn’t happen in my head. i had some shit happen and i don’t even want to think about it..but when it just slips into my head it feels like it’s taking over my head saying ‘THINK ABOUT ME…THINK ABOUT THE PAIN I MADE YOU GO THROUGH’ It’s as if i’m in a constant battle with myself.

I don’t want to be anything like my mother, If i turned out anything like her i’d hate myself more. \Oh and a quick heads up, you don’t know what me and my mothers relationship is like so please do not comment saying ‘family is importent’ It isn’t in my eyes, not when they have done certain things. I have high hopes in my career, and i really want to do well in life but i’m always thinking if it’s just a wasted effort. I hate the way i look so much. My face, my body..everything. I just want to wear a mask.

There is always something on my mind and i just want it to SHUT UP. i feel like screaming sometimes because i can’t control it. It feels like i’m unreal, that i’m just a character in some book living out their story, that i could die any second, i may be the author of my life but i don’t know when the ink in my pen is going to run out.
I don’t know who i am sometimes…

Please any help would be brilliant thanks..

I think the first thing I would tell you is that you probably need to talk to someone professionally about this, they are an impartial observer and can sometimes help allot. For anyone to give you any good advice, they would have to sit down with you and talk about exactly what happened. The reason your mind keeps focusing on your problems is because it is telling you that you need to deal with them. Not dealing with your problems is like getting in the ring with a boxer, then just turning around when the fight starts, you are going to get hit hard and get hit allot, but you will have no idea when or where. Turn around and face your problems, let your brain talk them out instead of trying to silence it. Try to divide your head into 2 parts, the part that has the problem, and an impartial part that knows all of the details but doesnt interject emotions, this part of the brain looks at the problem with logic and no emotion, before long you will have come up with something that makes it better. But like I said before, the best advice is to talk to someone about it, usually schools have a counselor you can talk to.

i have given my class 10 boards.i plan on giving IITJEE 2012.which one of these 3 institutes is the best for my training.i live very near to these 3 institutes’ branches so distance is not a problem.course material,nice faculty quality of teaching are the criteria on which to judge.and fees is also a factor.

FIITJEE and Brilliant Tutorials. Both are the best for IIT JEE coaching in every respect. Brilliant Tutorials is the single best IIT JEE coaching center in Chennai.

http://www.fiitjee.com/
http://www.brilliant-tutorials.com/
hsj

It makes me want to restrict myself from getting to close with a guy and hence, not getting into a relationship. that sounds like a brilliant plan if i were to protect myself from getting hurt. Just when I fall in love and hit the bottom, I always get hurt.

I was exsactly like you. Its like as soon as you get a new boyfriend everything seems perfect and you think "wow,…hes the one" then you get yourself soooo attached then soon as everythings going GREAT! then,….BAMM!!! its like yer relationship hitts a wall,.. you sink in and you just wanna cry and cry cuz of the hurt,…you feel like you cant pick yourself up,.. then when you do it happends all over again,..
i know how you feel and it hurts sooo fucking much,.. but i finaly found someone who im sooo hapy with
all you need to do is try not to get too attached right away i know its gunna be hard,… stay single for a while, make some time fo you,..hang out with friends,.family,. just have fun

heres something that always helps me:

" I believe that everything happends for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they’re right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust noon but yerself,…

and most importantly,…

Sometimes GOOD things fall apart,……………….. so BETTER things fall together"

keep yer head held high:)

am in class 11
i think i will get very exhausted if i join the regular courses!school home then again……….
will it be very useful if i join the crash courses?????

are u talking abt distance learning or test series,then u can do join it but join regular classes too because there is no shortcut for success.

U will enjoy classes,believe me.